Week 3 Update

It seems hard to believe I have already finished the Pain Management Program. In some ways I am glad to have it over and done with and am looking forward to getting back to normal life at home. At the same time, I am also sad. It is hard to leave behind the new routine that has offered new hope and the new friends that gave such necessary support. I also know I will not really be returning to normal life-at least not as I knew it before. There are several changes and adaptations that will need to be made if I am to maintain the small progress made and continue to improve things. I cannot say pain is any better controlled, but rather that I am managing (or coping) better overall in spite of the pain. I have been given information, tools, and support over the past 3 weeks. Now it is up to me to incorporate all of this into daily life when I get back home again. There will be rough times as I try things and learn how to make adjustments to find what will work best for me. There will need to be several major changes made in how I approach each aspect of life. This is simply yet another challenge to be met.

Acceptance. What does this really mean? I cannot say I have the answer. I suspect it varies somewhat from person to person and situation to situation. At present, my perspective is that I have accepted the chronic pain on a daily basis. Basically, I live with it and work to proactively prevent myself from overdoing things and contributing to higher pain levels. I have NOT accepted it in terms of lifelong condition. Rather, I still maintain hope that one day things will be better. I have very little hope at this time that the pain will ever entirely go away. At this time, I honestly do not know if the Lord wants me to fully accept things in a more permanent sense or not.

The best example I heard at the program that probably helped me the most to understand how to approach the pain was the analogy of a chronic health condition. If an individual has diabetes, there are several lifestyle changes that can help manage the condition. Even if signs and symptoms improve, the individual will never truly be free from the condition. Rather, the person will have diabetes the rest of his/her life. If the beneficial lifestyle changes are neglected, symptoms will return. Likewise, chronic pain is a legitimate medical condition. It is a lifelong diagnosis. If lifestyle changes are adopted and incorporated consistently, signs and symptoms can be effectively managed. Pain may possibly even appear to resolve fully. However, if the lifestyle changes are neglected, symptoms (pain) will return. While helpful, this example is also somewhat difficult to accept. It means admitting that there is physical weakness. It does not mean admitting defeat, nor does it indicate actual illness. While there are limitations, there are no disabilities.

What things will look like in the future, I cannot foresee. That there will be changes I realize and accept. I pray I am humble enough to take what I was taught and apply it to the best of my ability to maximize my ability to live life fully.